Back in junior high, Mrs. Marti, my 7th-grade English teacher gave the class a choice between two poems. We'd all have to choose one, memorize it, and then recite it in front of the class. Seventh-grade me wasn't the overtly friendly, gregarious, extroverted social butterfly you all know and love today, and the thought of public speaking immediately put knots in my stomach. Well, maybe we'll at least get to choose a cool poem about hot rods, sailing ships, or even that lady from Nantucket.
Choice number one was William Wordsworth's, "I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud". With all due respect to Mr. Wordsworth, I couldn't see myself talking about daffodils fluttering and dancing in the breeze with a straight face. What's showcase number two, Bob?
Mrs. Marti's second option was Robert Frost's, "The Road Not Taken".
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth...
OK. I think I can work with this. Graduation was still half a decade away, but I was still aware that choices were coming my way. Never again in my life would the array of possibilities be so large. While each and every decision made will eliminate certain options, hopefully, they will also open other opportunities. It's a good thing I was still pretty much a clueless kid. If I'd thought about it too much, the fear of a misstep or just the indecision in the face of the array of possibilities could have given way to paralyzing fear.
Fast forward about 20 years and countless decision points later. I was on a work crew and just shooting the breeze with some other guys. One of them takes a departure from the standard sports and work talk and decided to go deep. "Hey, Wayne, if you could roll back the years and have a chance to do it all over again, would you?" I didn't even hesitate.
"Absolutely not."
I must have been extremely loud and/or forceful in my reply because the all sawing and hammering stopped in my vicinity. My interrogator pressed on. "You mean to tell me if you had a chance at a do-over you wouldn't take it?" I could tell from his facial expression he was throwing the bullshit flag.
Here's the thing. It was a very specific series of choices that landed me where I was at that time. Just after high school graduation I almost went to LSU. I could have stayed at South Alabama after my freshman year. One of my professors suggested I would have been happier at Tulane. A college buddy was pushing hard to get me to transfer to Alabama with him. And adding to the din, Navy recruiters were still pinging me to enlist. Against this swirling counter current, I made the decision to transfer to Auburn.
It was in Auburn that I met and eventually fell hard for Andrea. Going back in time meant I might make a decision that altered my present reality. Even if I did wind up in Auburn, I might not have gone to that dinner. If there was a chance that I didn't wind up with Andrea, I wasn't risking it. So f* your do-over.
After I finished my diatribe, there were a few nods, and eventually, we all got back to the tasks at hand. Unbeknownst to me, someone in that assembly relayed my little soliloquy to Andrea. It earned me some points with the redhead.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
"Born to Be My Baby" - Bon Jovi
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