I may exist in a multi-quantum state. I'm either everywhere or I'm nowhere. Hear me out. The number of times people claimed to have seen me seems abnormally high. I walked into my barbershop this week and one of the dudes waiting on his two kids getting a trim looked my way. The guy started to stand as if to greet me but caught himself at the last moment. He looked a little shaken, "Oh, man, I thought you were this guy I know. You're a dead ringer for him."
*sigh
I'm thinking to myself, "Great. It's happening again."
My turn was up and as I took the chair, I could see him scrolling furiously through his phone. He saw the quizzical look on my face and said he was trying to find a picture of my supposed twin, but curiously none were on his phone.
This phenomenon isn't just local, either. I was overseas in Nairobi, walking down a street when a guy stopped me and shook my hand. Gregarious and smiling, he continued pumping my arm, "Hey, it's good to see you again!"
I'd just gotten into town that day, but this dude swore up and down we'd met the week before. I just looked at him. Stateside is one thing. But just how many stern-faced, middle-aged Filipinos are walking around Nairobi?
On the other end of the spectrum, I'm apparently good at playing a ghost.
I previously worked on a cloak-and-dagger project where I had to train subcontractors on maintaining network hardware. This crew was then flown around the country to perform maintenance tasks at our secure sites. Prior to flying out, they were supposed to contact the remote site and announce their arrival so there were no unpleasant surprises as our field personnel were masters of OpSec (Operational Security).
However, on one trip, one of these dudes flew out and cold-called the site after he landed.
"Who is this?"
"Hey! I'm <the Noob>. I'm here to work on your gear."
"I think you've got the wrong number."
"No, really, HQ sent me out. I work for you guys. Wayne briefed me on this."
"Oh. You know Wayne?"
"Heck, yeah! I know him really well."
"Describe him."
It was at this moment, Noob realized he'd actually never met me. During the entire time we used this service, I never met a single one of these guys. I disseminated all training materials and documentation via email. Any and all conversations were by phone. To Noob, I was a name without a face - a ghost.
Sometimes this cut a little deep.
I was living in Mobile, Alabama, for a while, and I ran into a lady who recognized the Mustang. Apparently, she also went to Long Beach High School.
"Wait. You drive that car? I remember seeing that yellow Mustang all the time in high school. Hmph. But I don't remember you." Many years on, this lady could give the make, model, and color of a car from high school, but she wouldn't have been able to describe the driver if her life depended on it.
But, man, I realized the 'Stang had a bigger rep than me. That's fair.
A current colleague of mine recently described me to a new staffer. "Dude. Wayne's got game when it comes to flying below the radar."
Maybe this ability to be everyone and no one, everywhere and nowhere is my mutant superpower. It's not nearly as cool as Wolverine's healing factor, but we play the hand we're dealt. Not to worry, mere mortals - I'm not looking for the notoriety, and know the spiel: "With great power comes great responsibility." Also, the late, great Tina Turner said we just don't need another hero. Besides, I'm not convinced a pair of tights and a cape is a good look on me.
Tina Turner - We Don't Need Another Hero
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